Dim Bulbs

This is an incandescent light bulb. It is an enemy of humanity. It’s just not green enough. Forget that it has served admirably for more than a century. Dismiss the thought that the vast majority of people have been quite happy with the results of using one. What we need to understand is that it is not energy efficient, and that is borderline evil.

That’s why Congress, in its wisdom, back in 2007, voted to ban the sale of all incandescent light bulbs beginning in 2012. This was a joint effort of Democrats and Republicans, the result of that most wonderful of all goals: bipartisanship. You see, only legislation that is bipartisan can be good. Anything else is bad. We should rejoice in the coming together of the collective mind.

This is the United States Constitution. It set up a strong, yet limited, government at the national level. One searches in vain within its provisions to find any authority to tell companies not to produce certain types of light bulbs. Neither can one find any authority to force individuals to buy twisty bulbs that are more expensive, far more dangerous when they break, and don’t put out as much actual light. They’re rather dim bulbs, but then they were developed by political dim bulbs, so that fits.

Some Republicans in the House thought it might be a good idea to revoke that 2007 law that overstepped constitutional boundaries, so yesterday they tried to pass a law that would accomplish that. They failed. Although the majority of Republicans voted to do so, not enough were on board to make it happen. Dim bulbs can be found in both parties: true bipartisanship.

What are we to do? Well, I’ve made my decision.

I’m stocking up on incandescent light bulbs.